A Cleantech Visit from St. Nicholas

Today’s column is by Green Register columnist Kyle Crider to his fellow employees at EcoTech, the first and only college entirely focused on preparing America’s workforce for careers in renewable energy and sustainability.

’Twas the night before Christmas, when all through Congressional Halls,
Not a Representative was stirring (it being Recess, and all).
The bills were hung by the podiums with care,
In hopes that sufficient votes soon would be there.

Cleantech employers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of wind turbines danced in their heads.
And mamma in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap.

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the global warming slush
Gave the luster of mid-day to objects embedded in the mush.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature EV, and eight tiny efficiency engineers.

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name!

“Now, Solar! Now, Geothermal! Now, Wind and Carbon Price!
On, Zero Waste! On, Production Tax Credit! On, LED and Energy Storage Device!
To the top of the house! To the top of the green wall!
Now power up! Power up! Power up all!”

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky.
So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the EV full of Renewables, and St Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof angle,
The placing and wiring of each little solar shingle.
As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the south-facing skylight St Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in green, from his boots to his hood,
And his clothes were embellished with eco-labels for good.
A bundle of energy-saving gadgets he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler, opening his reusable canvas pack.

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
Efficiency upgrades in place, he turned with a smirk,
“Christmas miracle or somehow,”
He grinned, “You’re net-zero now!”

He sprang to his EV, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
But I heard him exclaim, ’ere he drove out of sight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a cleantech night!”

by Kyle Crider

Kyle is Manager – Environmental Operations at Ecotech Institute and Education Corporation of America. He holds a Master of Public Administration degree with a double-emphasis in Urban Planning & Policy Analysis. He is also a Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design Accredited Professional, Neighborhood Development (LEED AP ND). He is currently in the Interdisciplinary Engineering Ph.D. Program at the University of Alabama at Birmingham. The opinions expressed in this blog are those of the author and not necessarily those of Ecotech Institute or Education Corporation of America. Email Kyle at kyle.crider@ecotechinstitute.com.

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